Wrong Turn or Faith?

i wonder from time to time, 'wtf am i doing in this aviation industry anyway? arent gonna be any future for us chinese in aviation. as MAS(the only company who provide type rated license course in Malaysia) [which is what u need to earn big $ in aviation] are more likey to send their own 'race' to it only. Sigh.

I got my aim i got my dream, my aim? earn at least 10k by age of 30. my dream? being happy with my love's one. no matter what i do. But can i really make those aim and dream come true with the current dilemma and in this tough industry? hmmm..

why am i in aviation at the first place anyway? to Think back, i wasnt a guy that know anything about aircraft, or traveling or whatever thing about aircraft. i dun even know how's a Boeing 737 look like anyway even until i finish my course. (perhaps that may show u my 'intrest' in aviation). But why do i choose this field back then?

Hmm.. started back when there's this one special fella, that always tell me about her dream to travel around, going places to places. and me? thinking ways to make that happen in the future? best way? me become the 'driver' myself and bring her to places, with sufficient financial freedom. Pilot is my best occupation if i wanna realize that dream of her's. But, failed to get scolarship, self-paid too expensive (250k and fyi lucky i nvr pay myself, there's 700 fresh grad pilot who is un-employ ) well, was in education fair, walking around. den saw this college promoting aircraft engineering and telling me how high is their engineer paid and how they can enjoy privileges from airliner as well. Im thinking, why not become an aircraft engineer and maybe try applying for pilot as well? This, i got the advantage from the others form5 fresh grad?

And here i am now. =) finished my course, no pilot scolarship dropping from the sky, realize how devastating is aviation field if u dun get ur Type Rated License in aviation, and gone through all those for someone which is already not here.

#fml.

P/s Im still wondering.