Neglected~

Y do i feel sour, a bit of spice and some tears in my heart? I'm single wert. shlud be no1 to hurt me d wan. but stil?? This is what i call life. is full of surprise. The moment when i 1st met this young lady. It gimme a feeling of looking forward to see her everytime. as time pass.. the more and more i wanted to see her and do for her. but it seems like the more and more she slipping away from my hand? haiy. 2 Options. 1st. Try harder and make sure she one day wil touch and realise my existant in her life. 2nd. Give up and find an0ther wan.
What it is to be left in life if u do everything half way? Same principle as farming. If u dun farm, u dun get any harvest. but if u get ur ass down in tat field working hard everyday. It might, or might not get harvest. If the crop stil cant be harvest, at least u can giv up by telling urself. 'u give every last drop of sweat on working it out'

Gambateh jereboi. Ur hardwork wil worth the juice someday.

Realisation

jz another average normal day for me, but my ass cant sit still at home. went for pool with joseph and gang. Riding behind a crazy driver which feel like sitting a roller coaster than a car. =.= pool, Asia Cafe and back home i am 5.00am. and im blogging b4 i watch my movie and go to bed in the morning.

i finally realise and admit and surrender. I'm a boy, a lover, an idiot which got no medicine to cure. Reason y i'm in my current state i also know it very cleary. so, i dun mind telling the world how fucking useless i'm. I smoke, I alcoholic, I wanted to club, i wanted to flirt sometimes, i wanted to know girls! i cant stay still while im in a relationship, I lied, i cant be truth to myself, i always hurt the person beside me but, i know what it feels to love a girl and how miserable life is without some1 by yourside. Sigh.. I'm an asshole. I feel jealous sometimes, idk why eventhough she is not mine. >.< think too much d jere. time to go to bed! good nite readers.

Xmas!!

"Everybody love olo"

Wah~ cover back what i miss last week d. =) been going out and is tiring sial..
Wed: wake up, drive-> dai ka jie hse at ampang den yi ka jie hse at cheras den all the way -> klang! to eat bah kut teh.. haha.. they never went b4 so as i promise them earlier, mar ended up makan 海参肉骨茶.. after that went to 1u, to catch avatar. GSC was so fking full.. and we ended up in TGV. my god! the seat are as sucks as what my fren say.. 2 hr 45 min on the seat and what i get is a pain in the ass. but it was really a nice movie. dinner at the curve and went to Study at The Library after that. lepak til almost 2am. Bottle of Hennesy+ Green Label + leng lui ^^ makes jereboi a happyboi. haha. driving is never be the same when u got some1 there to nag nag nag when u are half drunk-tard and flying in the high way~ =X And my day finish off with me sleeping in the car as i got no key and my siblings is in stage 4 Sleep and im too good as a son to not waking up my parents. >.<

Thurs: Its christmas eve! yay!! Planning to countdown in my bed with my laptop. but is hard when u are too popular. LOL. Last min plan, lil celebration in kat's hse~ WeiWen is back! and i dint even knew it until yest. == Bbq, Lobak, Vodka, Chivas and heineken. really DTD(drink til drunk) i was planning to stay her hse and help her finish off the an0ther bottle liquor, but my kawan kawan wanted to back d. so, bo bian lar.. me, jl and kel went pool afterthat. I was jz too high to hit the cue ball already. so i jz snap snap snap some photos only.

Fri: 1st thing others wake up, first reaction is, "Its christmas!!" mine? "god bloody dumb fuck brother, bang car?! my car sial!!!!!! cb betul, go sunway 2 time, 2 time also kena thing, 1st time drive til overheat and jz ngam ngam fix it only. spend 1k+ now, bang at the door! my door gone case! argh!!!! noob til lidet. damn kau suay.. haiy.. today i not gonna do or go anything anywhere. i wil be guaiboi stay at hse. =) is xmas, it is meant to be spent with families~ merry xmas and happy new year every1!

p/s: will update kat hse foto in fb, i dun hv my camera with me now.

Memories

It's kao hao birthday today, so we went and hang out and shopping in midvalley with a movie that i feel i totally waste my money watching it, Storm warrior.. its sux.. and when i walking in mid..

When i pass by YoSushi, i think about the time we both eating der for minor dinner~
When i pass by the taiwan food shop, i think about the time we both fast fast makan Osyster mee sua together b4 catching the UP movie~
When i pass by folli follie, i remember the time when u ask me to buy u a bracelet and i say no prob, den u pull me in and when i see the price, and tel u. "let's get out from here" haha
When i pass by skin food, i remember company u buy cover black eye de thing, den u try try try der. asking me got better anot got nicer anot, wanna buy ar? with the worker around.. den i say ok lor, u like lor.. but both of us know it look darker when u apply it but no dare to say.. haha..
When i pass by carlos, i remember the time when the burger is as big as ur face, but u stil manage to finish it tat time! haha.. *clap clap*
When i see the cinema, i remember all the movie we catch there.. Movie marathon once, Sector 14 i think den after that UP.. but u're too tired, so ended up sleeping like my baby in the cinema. =)

No matter where i go, what i do, no matter how hard i try to forget u and let u have a better life, each bit of pieces of our memory will force out. telling me that i still very miss you. Since Today morning, i emo d because of my fking memory, during walking in mid valley, memories forced out, and night? The misses burst me to tears even when im in mamak. hmm.. dunno how much longer will i cont to be like dis.
finish off my day pooling with joseph and his philipine nephew which is stil older than me. =.=

-signing off with a heart and mind filling with memories-

1st week.. (checked)

Been a few days since i upload my blog. Is not because i'm too busy to update it. it because im TOO DAMN FREE. =/ nothing happen in my holiday, so no point updating it. =(
Is been a week since holiday. lets see what i have done.
Sunday~thurs----- wake up->eat->on9->one piece->help mummy out-> back home, bath, cont One piece til 5,6am. been repeating dis cycle CONSTANTLY.. feel like a robot. T.T den fri went pool and mamak with gang.. and that cycle is repeating itself again. lol
Y have i been so boring? 1.no people company, 2. no money, 3. don't feel like going out, 4. my car broke down since sunday but thank goodness is has been fixed yest. =)
Life isn't that interesting without her around anymore.. hope she's having a blast from her holiday cause is hell for her next sem..
but..... I GOT A FEELING~ next week gonna be a boom boom pow. hahaha! got my plan all lined up on the 2nd and 3rd week.. will update to u guys. =)

Lastly.. who wanna movie marathon with me next week?! i wanna watch a movie with u can? >.<

Holiday lur~

"deleted ur number~ is suffering to everyday having ur number and forcing myself not to bother u. wanna block me den cont block. u happy den enuf. love some1 is not all about owning her. is about wanting her to be happy, to understand what she want in her life, eventhough i dont have the chance to provide u those happiness anym0re, but what i hope best everyday, is for u to be happy.. =) as time pass.. i hope that me and u can stil be friend. and i wish tat you and me will still hv a chance to look each other in the eye. telling u and me 'i love you' "

Finally, last paper is over. and i got 20days to get a good rest from those fking books! haha.. let's see what am i gonna do in dis poor holiday? money takda, gf pun takda. =.= time? gonna spend on watching One Piece, Help mama do cookie, money? no1 to love no1 to spend for, so im gonna spend it on my 2nd best fren, boos~ haha.. gonna drink til i drop, party til i drop. but do i hav kaki? ~.~

Is all about dedication

"no matter how angry u are to me, how much u hate me, but i know beneath it. is something call love. Eventhough i cant see u anymore, but every nite and everyday b4 and after sleep. you're the only thing that i will think of. Haiz.. days without u is so different~ no matter what i do also i feel something is missing. but BBB will wait.. wait for that empty space of mine to be filled. is something that no1 can ever fill inside me. i believe in what i doing, and what im waiting for. someday will make a result. 'what i wanna do, what i wanna get, no matter how i also wont give up' isnt dis the thing u like about me? =) and i will dedicate myself to keep this promise forever, to love, to wait, to change and to be forgiven."

boring~ been spending my last 3 days with One Piece. lol. and is 2 more day away for my big exam. but i dint even been motivate to open the book.. really will die.. haiz.. 2 apple for whole day, until night when there's some1 finally free to company me for dinner. thks god i dun hv to strave to death! haha. al-salam, al-salam... went 2 round f0r the night. =.= and is one piece time for me now.. tmr.. i will STUDY!! yes i know i can do it. gambateh jere!

Empty

"Empty, Alone in dis empty house, Alone in this chemistry, Alone in this promise, Alone in this dream, this love, this life.. everything seems empty without you. Maybe i do deserved to be empty afterall. Everynight i go to bed with a smile and a stab in the heart, which i dun even know when this pain will end.. hmm.. "

A day which suppose to end happily but end it in the completely other way.. My final over, staying over coll.. thought of being a company to her, but it seems like the last thing she need in her life is me. i dunno y such a dumb person like me exist in this world. they say 'orang bodo tak da ubat cure' maybe really true.. went f0r lunch with yuki and her bf. after that went pm with them also. always feel like being a lamp post with all my frens which i hang out with. sometimes see d, really hurt.. if them dont appear in yourlife, me and you, wouldn't even go until dis stage.. Mood seems getting better after expressing some to my bro(cerd). and at night, was on a really good mood to goldcoast until a saw a myvi with red rims, and a familiar face. which always used to sit beside me. but not anymore.. emotional got 'a lil' broken down tat moment and it spoil my mood for the whole nite.

Was in the beach, under the bright moon and star. which i keep imagining it with you. hmm.. i wont a chance to do those stuff we nvr used to do b4 d..
-out-